Monday, December 16, 2013

Did Hell Freeze Over? But on the plus side…

So, Maggie, Vee & I went to see Star this weekend… Star, Estella Therese, is our friend that passed away last year. I’ve tried to see her a few times and even though I WAS POSITIVE I knew where she was/is buried, I gave in to the ‘slight possibility’ that PERHAPS I must be in a different area- because I didn’t see a headstone or even a marker. SO, we decided to go to the office to see what we could see (is there a song that used that phrase?) Anyhoo - - -A very nice man, with a very funny personality, was the lucky person chosen to assist us in our quest to locate several loved ones. Mags found hers, Vee found hers, I found my grandma (well, actually, turned out it wasn’t her, as my grandma is buried at another cemetery- boy is MY face red…) AND we found Star….with no headstone & no marker. WTH?? How can that be? I know - I know I KNOW (!), we are not supposed to judge BUT it’s been a year and a half since Star crossed over. I’m not gonna lie, this upset me. 

After Mags makes a couple of calls, we find out that in honor of Stars’ birthday, which is December 17th, St. Gregory’s evening Mass is intended for our friend. OH NO! A Catholic Mass – IN A CHURCH—egad! What a quandary for me (background scoop for y’all: I have a very, very strong aversion to Catholic Mass- traumatized as a child- long story – won’t… okay CAN’T elaborate). What to do- what to do…

Okay, it is for my friend. I HAVE to go, right?  Let me tell you that the last time I set foot in a church was, indeed for Star’s funeral… I am certain she is laughing her ass off in Heaven. (STAR?? Really funny girl!! I know you can hear me.. I hope you are having a great laugh!)

Yes, Bob and I did go to the Mass. During this very special service (I like to sit in back so I can sneak out)- well, sitting towards the back just made it more difficult because there was this child, a baby really, that evidently has never heard the words ‘sit down or shhhhh’ because this child was running and screaming and running & screaming and running & screaming through the entire service.(I will say that when my kids were young, I had more patience, but my kids also never were allowed to disrupt or be wild lunatics in a place where it is expected to be peaceful,but I digress). The mother, (I assume she was the mother) just sat there.    I lean over to Bob and commented that this lady is just wrong to allow her child to be disruptive. Bob (& Mags) state that, ironically the service is on how we shouldn’t judge- FUNNY STAR!!! REALLY FRICKIN’ FUNNY! 

Maggie & Bob are, of course, getting a chuckle – at my expense – but….that’s okay. I was in a church, I figure of ALL places, this is where I shall be forgiven… lol

I don’t know what the solution should be  - - If I had money, I would happily pay to have a headstone for my lifelong (and beyond) friend. NOBODY should be laid to rest without a way for loved ones to come and sit & visit.  It’s just disrespectful. I am NOT judging, I am merely stating my opinion.

Star doesn’t have a marker or headstone….and this is upsetting to me. As Maggie’s other half, Bill Keenley, says you don’t treat our dearly departed in this manner. For whatever reason – there HAS TO be some reason- a reason for which I am not privy (again NOT judging).

Happy Birthday, Star, I miss you every day.

BUT on the plus side… I wasn’t wrong… (did you ever doubt that?)… I knew exactly where Star is buried, sans marker and headstone, I know where Star is.... she is always in my heart! 

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